


Can You Understand Pain?

by HeavenScent



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Caring Bones, Hurt Jim, Hurt/Comfort, Light BDSM, M/M, Subspace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-20
Updated: 2014-07-20
Packaged: 2018-02-09 16:06:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1989210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeavenScent/pseuds/HeavenScent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim wants to be hurt, craves the pain. McCoy just wished his friend would come to him about it, instead of going to strangers. Coaxing James T. Kirk into doing anything is a delicate business - fortunately, in this case, Jim is happy to be coaxed.</p><p>An 'in the beginning' fic, but a sequel will be around soon!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can You Understand Pain?

**Author's Note:**

> You should know there isn't any sex in this fic (though there is sexual contact), but there will be lots of sex in the sequel! Which I'm currently writing, and it should be done in the next month or two. In the mean time, enjoy!
> 
> \- HS

Jim really wanted to collapse on his bed and either fall asleep or come so hard he blacked out. Fortunately for future-Jim, he remembered the last time he'd done this and the royal reaming Bones had given him the next day. He sighed and tapped his communicator as he leaned against the wall. "Kirk to McCoy."

There was a delay of a few seconds before Leonard responded. "Jim? What the hell are you doing back on the ship?"

Jim couldn't help but grin at the memory. "You know that thing you told me to never do again or God help me? Well, I've done it again."

There was another pause, but this one was charged with…something. "I'll be there in two minutes. Don't go to sleep. McCoy out."

Jim sighed: Bones sounded pissed. He knew his friend would want to examine him, but he wasn't exactly capable of sitting at the moment, so he crawled gingerly onto his bed and face-planted in his pillow. It was so comfortable he was half-asleep by the time Bones used his override to enter.

The first thing he heard was "dammit Jim" quickly followed by the beep of a tricorder and hurried steps. "If you insist on doing this, why can't you at least be sensible about it and go to someone trained: not just hand a whip to the nearest person and say 'punish me'?"

Jim frowned into the pillow. "How do you know how I pick my doms?"

There was yet another pregnant pause. "Jesus, Jim, I have no idea how you pick your dominants, but I sure as hell hope you don't do it like that!"

"Not exactly…" Kirk felt Bones' fury building and tried to head it off. "I mean, I don't get random people off the street ‒ just random people from the clubs that cater to this sort of thing." He was still slurring a little, floating in subspace…he liked it here. It was peaceful.

The tricorder stopped beeping, indicating it had finished diagnosing. There was another silence. "Jim," McCoy started, but didn't say anything else.

Kirk had had enough and rolled his head so he could look at his friend's face. He almost wished he hadn't. There was pain there. Real pain. And sadness. There was anger hinting around the edges, but mostly, it was pain.

Leonard's accent had deepened and his voice was thicker. "I told you last time, Jim, I told you that if you needed this again you had to come to me. I would help you with it. You agreed. You swore that you wouldn't do," he waved his hand over Kirk's red-stained shirt, "this. You swore it. So why?"

Jim closed his eyes to gather his thoughts. The hurt in Bones' voice was pulling him back to the real world; endorphins were waning and bright stabs were starting to drown out the contented thrum of his bruises. He didn't open his eyes. "Bones, I can hardly think right now, let alone try and explain my reasoning. Could you just let me sleep? We'll talk tomorrow, promise."

McCoy rolled his eyes, not that Jim could see it. "Sure Jim. We'll talk tomorrow." He knew full well that Kirk was unlikely to talk about this, ever, but he had ways, and whether the Captain liked it or not, they would be talking about it. "Get some sleep Jim. Do you want anything for the pain?"

Kirk chuckled tiredly and squinted his eyes open. "That would defeat the purpose Bones."

The other man nodded. "Right, sure." He packed away the tricorder and settled on the couch. "I'll be here when you wake up, kid." He promptly rolled over and stopped talking.

Jim sighed and closed his eyes again. They were both asleep in minutes.

XxxxX

Drifting gently from unconsciousness was nice: the sharp pull in Jim's back as he stretched lazily was less pleasant. He grimaced and immediately stopped all movement, relaxing into the sheets. This time, he gingerly shuffled until he could shift his legs off the edge of the bed and kneel beside it. He stopped there for a brief rest before, very slowly, climbing to his feet. His back didn't like that. His ass was also unhappy. He groaned and hobbled to the bathroom, using the furniture as a prop when he could.

Jim knew that a water shower would help clean away the blood from his raw back, but the thought of the stinging seemed too much to bear this morning, so he opted for sonic instead. Ten minutes later and he was feeling marginally better: muscles less stiff, though still complaining.

He stood in front of the mirror and turned to look over his shoulder. He grinned. The guy he'd picked last night had been a champion. The pattern of bruises and cuts was pleasingly geometrical: harsh lines crisscrossing down either side of his spine with bruises fading out towards his flanks; some even wrapping around and spreading across his chest and stomach.

He sighed in delight and rolled his shoulders, watching how the crosshatch moved over his skin. He grinned and tried to get a better look at his ass. It was hard, given how high his mirror was, but he managed. Unlike his back, there was no pattern across his butt cheeks: just various shades of purple, green and blue overlaid with a faint red blush. Jim was impressed the glow hadn't faded, even though he'd slept a solid six hours.

A handheld mirror was required when he wanted to check his hole for damage. He knew any tearing would have shown up when Bones checked him last night, so at least he didn't have to worry about…

Fuck. Bones.

Jim almost dropped the mirror when he remembered that the man was sleeping on his couch. He continued cursing quietly to himself, absentmindedly putting the mirror away as he tried to figure out how to get past the couch without waking his friend.

He was up early, wasn't due on the bridge for another hour ‒ no good excuse to leave from that quarter. He couldn't bluff a medical emergency because it was his damn CMO he was trying to avoid. He was still thinking himself in circles when he heard a rap on the door.

"Are you done yet Jim? You've been in there a while." Bones voice was husky from sleep and Jim didn't bother trying to stop the shiver it sent through him.

"Almost done Bones, give me a minute to put some pants on."

"It'd be easier if you didn't."

Jim stopped, pants in hand, and frowned at his reflection. He must not have heard that right. "Come again?"

"I know I used the tricorder last night, but I want to do a physical exam as well. It'll be easier if you just come out and hop on your bed ‒ I'll be out once I've taken a piss."

Jim's frown deepened. "Why do you want to do a physical as well?"

Bones' patience, never particularly expansive, was at an end. "Dammit Jim, just get your bruised ass out here and lay on the damn bed."

Knowing when to concede gracefully, Jim palmed the door open to a grouchy McCoy who slid passed him into the bathroom with a grunt.

"Mornin' Bones." Jim looked over his shoulder in time to watch the door close in his face. He sighed. "Or not." He figured he may as well follow instructions since McCoy would get him on the bed one way or another: Jim was not feeling up to an argument right now.

Leonard kept his word and was out of the bathroom in under a minute. He spotted Jim on the bed and his surprise was almost immediately eclipsed by empathy. As he approached his friend, he couldn't help hissing through his teeth. This was the first time he'd seen the damage uncovered, and not just a report about it. He hovered a hand over Jim's red ass, surprised he couldn't feel heat radiating from it.

Jim squirmed a little under the scrutiny and looked back over shoulder, his blue eyes jolting Leonard from his unprofessionalism. He shook his head. "Sorry, let's get started. How much are you hurting right now, while you lie still?"

Bones asked him about a million questions, though Jim forgot most of what he answered. Eventually the doctor took a hands-on approach, checking his hips, spine, shoulders and ribs for anything the tricorder might have missed. Jim had to hold back from purring under Bones' skillful touch, despite the discomfort of his lacerations and bruising. He didn't care about that as much as he enjoyed having his friend smoothing his hands softly over his skin.

McCoy soon decided that there wasn't anything dire about Jim's physical condition, though he was worried about Jim's psychological and emotional state. He'd heard Jim murmuring in delight at his touch, despite his friend's efforts at muffling his voice. Leonard was worried Jim wasn't getting the proper aftercare, given such a positive reaction to a fairly clinical medical exam.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Bones rested a hand on the small of Jim's back. "Jim? I have one more question."

The younger man nuzzled his hip against Bones' and subtly arched into the hand on his back. "Shoot."

Leonard took a deep breath. "Are your dominants giving you sufficient aftercare?" Jim froze under his hand, which he took as a bad sign.

The young captain sighed and propped himself up on his elbows so he could look at the doctor over his left shoulder. "That depends on what you deem 'sufficient'."

He continued before Bones could start ranting, "they give me aftercare, soothing the pain, lying with me for a while, just gentle touching in general. Usually that's enough. Sometimes I'd like a little more, but…"

Leonard frowned. "But what? When have you ever been shy about asking for what you want?"

Jim looked down at his hands on the sheets. "It's different with this Bones. They're my doms. I want to make them happy. Asking for more than I know they'd be comfortable giving…it just isn't in my submissive mindset. If they offered to do more, I'd accept, but I'm not going to suggest it. Especially not to a stranger, and they're the only ones I have."

Bones sighed and kneaded the small of his back. "I guess I can understand that." He paused for a few seconds while he contemplated what to say. "I just…I want you to get what you need Jim. Why keep doing this if it isn't working for you?"

"It does work for me Bones," he glanced over his shoulder again, "at least until they've had enough ‒ it just happens, usually, that the doms are done before I am."

Not liking the sound of that, Bones frowned and asked another question. Awkwardly. "Are you getting any…release from these encounters?" Jim looked at him blankly. He sighed and rubbed Jim's back, collecting his adulthood. "Do you get an orgasm, Jim?"

Understanding spread across the younger man's face. "Oh, yeah, usually…I think only one or two have left me wanting in that way. Though with them, it was just another aspect of their dominance, and we'd agreed to it beforehand. Understandably, that's not my favourite type of encounter," he grinned his cheeky grin, the one McCoy did his very best not to smirk back to. He was probably unsuccessful, going by the smug look on Jim's face.

"Just one more intrusive question, Jim."

"I don't like the sound of that, Bones."

"I still have to ask. I know you're insides aren't torn, but did you have any kind of penetrative sex last night?"

A small, blissful smile slid slowly across Jim's face. "Yeah…yeah, I did have sex last night…it was awesome."

Leonard did his best not to tense at that. And he really didn't like how delighted Jim still sounded about it. "Then I'm sorry, Jim, but I'm going to have to check that as well."

Trying his best to look woebegone, and not like all his dreams were coming true, Jim nodded. "Sure Bones. I trust you."

McCoy took a deep, steadying breath before shifting further down the bed. He settled a hand on each hip. "Just stay relaxed Jim, as much as you can." Jim nodded into the pillow he was clutching.

Leonard tried his very best to remain in a professional mindset as he slid his hands down Jim's ass and used his thumbs to gently pull his cheeks apart. The small, puffy red hole in the centre winked at him as Jim tensed. "Relax, darlin', and this'll be much easier."

While Bones didn't notice he slipped into a drawl, Jim certainly did. That husky voice always made his insides melt. He inhaled deeply and tried to relax on the out-breath.

"That's it," Leonard practically crooned. He manoeuvred the fingers of his right hand so he could still hold the cheeks apart, and stroke across the small muscle with his index finger, testing for soreness.

Jim managed not to whimper, though he wanted to. He wasn't at all sore, but the gentle way Bones was handling him…he was slipping back into subspace.

Leonard knew he was having an effect on Jim because the man had stopped talking ‒ only two things could do that: extreme pain or extreme pleasure. He sure as hell hoped it was the second, but he had to check. "Jim? Jim, tell me how you're feeling. Any pain?"

His friend groaned into the pillow and shook his head. "None a't'all, Bones. Feels good."

McCoy didn't like the slurring. "Are you sure you're alright Jim?" He stilled his finger and waited.

Jim whimpered and writhed. "Why'd you stop? Keep goin', please Bones." He looked back over his shoulder and pouted. "Please?"

Leonard held a short internal debate, a violent one, before coming to a decision. He removed his hands from Jim, despite the pleading that damn-near broke his heart to hear.

"Bones? Why'd you stop? Did I do something wrong? 'M sorry." Jim dropped his head back to the pillow and moped silently.

"Oh darlin', you haven't done anything wrong, not at all. I just don't want to take advantage when you're not in your right mind."

"But I wan' you to take advantage."

The words were mumbled into the pillow, but Leonard heard them: his heart leapt. "If you still feel that way once your back has healed, come and find me. I'll always give you what you need, Jim, so long as you give informed consent."

"Can't I give that now?"

"No, Jim, you can't; and I'm cancelling your shift ‒ take a day off to recharge your batteries. Doctor's orders."

"Since when do I follow those?" Jim was drifting back from subspace, embarrassment at the forefront. "Bones…I'm sorry I asked for that, I know that's not what we are to each other."

Leonard shook his head. "I meant what I said earlier Jim. If you still want me, as a dom or otherwise, after those bruises heal, you can ask: I'll take care of you."

Jim rolled onto his side, utterly unashamed about his nudity and the half-erect state of his cock. "I know you will Leo. You always have." He noticed how desperately Bones was trying not to stare and grinned. "You sure you're not up for it right now?"

McCoy growled and stood, away from temptation. "You're a tease, Jim, such a damn tease. Put it away before I do it for you."

"That doesn't sound like much of a‒" Jim cut off with a gasp as he got halfway through the suave move of linking his hands behind his head and rolling onto his back. Stupid.

Leonard rolled his eyes. "Typical." He helped his friend back onto his stomach. "Stop trying to show off, and rest for god's sake. You need it. And take this." He took sadistic delight in jabbing Jim's neck with a pain reliever ‒ he also rather enjoyed the yelp it provoked. "It'll help with the pain; whether you want it or not, you do need it. This one," he placed a second hypo on the bedside table, though that didn't stop Jim from wincing in anticipation, "is a muscle relaxant. Just in case." He leant down and pressed a short, but firm, kiss on the back of Jim's skull. "I'll be back to check on you at the end of Alpha shift. Behave yourself until then."

Jim didn't reply as Bones left his rooms, too stunned by his parting gesture. He reached a hand back and rubbed gently over the spot Leonard had kissed. It felt amazingly good. Like something Leo would do every morning before Jim got out of bed. He decided immediately that he wanted more of them. Lots more. And he knew just how to get them.

 

FIN (until the sequel)


End file.
